Five Months Old

The perfect age for his first visit to the TAB.


After my appointment with the nutritionist yesterday, I met up with Dad and Alex. Dad just happened to be at the TAB, so in we went.

Apparently my diet is pretty good. I was told to always have some juice when I have iron rich plant foods, as the vitamin C helps to metabolise the iron, and to try not to skip breakfast, no matter how difficult the infabeast is.

That’s one more thing to check off the list of possible reasons that my child is so thin.

Have spoken to Tresillian “centralised intake”, am now waiting for a cancellation.

On Monday he weighed 5.11kg, and while we were in the bath before the appointment with Dr McVeagh, INIGO REACHED OUT AND GRABBED THE RUBBER DUCKIE!!!!

I then made him repeat the feat a few times to make sure I wasn’t delusional. It’s the one thing we’ve been worried about with his development, despite the fact that he is a virtuoso of two handed dummy tricks…

Another visit with the paediatrician

Saw the Pead today, she’s booking us in for a residential at Tresillian so they can do a further “examination” of his feeding and sleep routine. They probably want to make sure I am feeding him! So I will call up tomorrow and wait for a cancellation – and then we’ll have to be on standby to go at a moment’s notice. At least this time we’ll be going to Willoughby – not back to Nepean! I hope the food there is a little better, but at least this time it’s only for 24 hours (or so they say now!).

Tomorrow morning we are going to see the nutritionist, and then I have to get a urine sample from the boy to a pathologist. We have already done two urine samples, but both were contaminated, so now we have to do a “clean catch” – which means holding a cup under the bits until he pees! It took Mark and I nearly an hour to do, but we got it – I just hope it’s “clean”!

Basically, it’s about 9 weeks since the boy has put on any real weight. The paed said today that it’s not normal, and we’re continuing investigations….

And yes, I’m worried. It doesn’t mean I have PND. It’s normal to be worried when your child doesn’t gain any weight for over two months. If I wasn’t worried, I’d be notified to DoCS, and if I worry too much I’ll be locked up in a psych ward.

I’m actually looking forward to Tresillian – at least I’ll be able to get some reassurance that I am doing my best. And hopefully we can take the next step towards diagnosis and cure, and my happy little boy will become a happy AND healthy little boy.

Tomorrow he’ll be five months old.

Skinny Baby

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As Emily noted, he did poo yesterday. Little blighter sometimes won’t poo for 10 days at a time (which is apparently perfectly normal for fully breastfed babies), and then does 3 in 24 hours. Since lunchtime yesterday, he’s done 5.

Should have weighed him before lunch.

Today it’s eight weeks since he has put on any significant amount of weight. In eight weeks he’s gone from 4.97kg up to 5.16kg, and now back down to 5.05kg.

In the picture above, he’s wearing a disposable nappy, as I was caught short at the clinic today. It’s a Huggies, newborn size.

The same size that he was put in at the hospital.

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The tabs are about an inch further apart than they were, but the fact that it still fits is a little creepy. As are his ribs, and bony spine.

On the advice of the clinic nurse, I rang the paed, and am seeing her again on monday.

In the meantime, we are going up to Pearl Beach for the weekend, and hopefully I can chill out a little.

The Mask of Motherhood

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Yesterday on Monday, I baked.

I did three loads of laundry, tidied the house, made minestrone, went shopping, and made cupcakes.

Which sounds impressive when you know I have a nearly five month old baby. Until I tell you that I had a staff of three.

Yup, one to mind the baby, one to sort out five months of mail (bills, superannuation for two people, and health fund stuff), and one to help me read the recipe and do the baking, since I am so damn sleep deprived.

Mark was home sick, so he was primary baby wrangler, Dad did the paperwork, and then Mum came over after work to help me cook my first ever batch of cupcakes. And thank god she did – apparently sleep deprivation messes with your ability to read and follow simple instructions.

I read “The Mask of Motherhood” before the boy was born, and can see that the “mask” has fallen on me a little too. Which is funny.

I never thought I would be a mother, I never thought I had “it” in me. Which I suppose made it easier for me to quit my job and live off Mark while I was so ill during the pregnancy. I felt ok about not pulling my weight financially because my physical impairment was a shared burden. And Mark absolutely supported me and my needs every single day.

But now I am a Mother. With a capital M. And I don’t feel entitled to anything.

Thank you one and all for your insightful and supportive comments. I am going to do a lot more thinking about this, maybe one day it will make sense to me.

In the meantime, I’m asking for help.

I need it.


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The boy cries a lot. Perhaps that is why he refuses to gain weight. Still 5.06kg as at last Thursday (17/04/08).

This does my head in more than I am willing to admit publicly, but his head circumference is increasing, as is his length. Apparently his brain development is going great guns, and breast milk is the best thing for that. Still, you have to have a sense of humour.

The second urine test came back with contamination again, not sure what’s going on there.

On Wednesday, he slept for a whole hour without waking, and I sewed.

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Yes, that is a cotton chenille bib with mauve chenille rick rack trim. I even (after a false start with homosexual snaps) installed snaps that work. I am legend.

Mark looked at it and claimed it looked “like a dishrag”. I am considering a divorce.