Amazing

Some good news.

When Kevin ’07 won the election, I really only felt relief that John Howard wasn’t going to embarrass us in front of the neighbours any more.

But then he ratified Kyoto.

And then he said Sorry.

And I dared to feel hopeful.

But then, for a long time, nothing happened.

This news is wonderful – it is not just a symbolic gesture, it is a powerful and practical move that will hopefully make things just a little bit easier.

Keep it up Kev – there is more to do.

Like Relationship Equality for example.

Edited to add – it appears that this change only applies to lesbian parents. I wonder when men will get the same rights.

Edited again – Red quite rightly points out that this is NSW only. Of course it would be far too sensible to have a single system for the whole country!

Breastfeeding Nazis

*I’ve been sitting on this post for a few days, because I don’t want to offend anyone. I’ve decided to post, because it’s stuff I believe, and I think it’s important. It is not about you – and if you think I am having a go, I’m not. I’m just very sad and frustrated, and this is what I was thinking as I tried to work through the issues in my head.

The continuing horror of the melamine laced milk in China has me in tears every time I think about it. Kidney stones are one of the most painful things that can happen to a grown up, so the thought of it happening to thousands and thousands of babies is beyond imagining.

And the more I think about it, the more concerned I am. Because this should never have happened. As I see it, three things contributed to the problem, and there is no easy fix. This could happen again and again (and probably will), unless these three things change.

1. Greed. Obvious, but it would be over simplifying things of we just left it at that.
2. Marketing. This is part of greed – but it’s a two way street. If we call Nestle and it’s ilk “The Bad Guys”, and the World Health Organisation “The Good Guys”, it’s important that the good guys get the same marketing budget as the bad guys.
3. Backlash. When I was a young ‘un, I believed that feminism was over. I thought that my mother and her generation had fought the good fight, and won. It was a rude shock, and it was about a decade later that the book Backlash came out, describing the new front on which feminism is being fought. It is because of this backlash that we saw the rise of raunch culture, and the popularity of the phrase “I’m not a feminist, but…(insert feminist statement here)”.

I believe the same thing is happening in baby health. The 70’s saw the lowest rates of breastfeeding in Australia, and in the 80’s things turned around. More research was done in human lactation, and women were encouraged to go back to the boob. The artificial milk marketing machine began to work on developing nations, and there were appalling consequences for child health. Back then, I had only a peripheral knowledge of what was going on, but I stopped buying Nestle products because of their unethical business practices.

And now, In Australia, breastfeeding is strongly encouraged in hospital. The Australian Breastfeeding Association has chapters all over the country, and is a fantastic resource for anyone who wants to breastfeed and is having hassles. There are accreditation programs for businesses that want to become breastfeeding friendly workplaces, and we have laws to protect a woman’s right to feed her child in public. We don’t have paid maternity leave, which would be a big help, but we’re working on it.

There is the expectation that most women will at least try to breastfeed. So of course there is a fine balance between behaviour that is supportive of the establishment of the breastfeeding relationship, and behaviour that is aggressive and judgemental.

I have heard the term “Breastfeeding Nazi” too many times now. I understand that many people feel judged because they don’t breastfeed, and I am sincerely sorry for that. I know that EVERY mother wants to do the best for her child. And for some babies, the best is artificial milk. I struggled for months to get it working for Inigo and I, so I feel that I am qualified to say that I understand the pain and suffering when it’s not working. And I was accused by a friend of just being “trendy” by insisting on breastfeeding. She honestly thought that Inigo’s weight problem was caused by breastfeeding, and that if I would just give him artificial milk, he would be fine.

There were many times when I thought that both of us would be better off if I just gave him artificial milk, so I have profound empathy for women who have made that choice. I don’t have an answer for how we can be supportive of breastfeeding and supportive of artificial feeding if breastfeeding doesn’t work out – but let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water.

Research shows that human milk is best for human babies (barring medical complications like rare allergies, etc.). That is a fact. Research also shows that babies are healthier when they are born full term. They are better off if their mothers don’t smoke, if their fathers don’t take cocaine, if they aren’t exposed to lead pollution. We all want to provide the very best for our children, and the best is human milk.

Ancient internet lore has it that the first person to mention Hitler or the Nazis automatically loses any flame war, and I think that principle should apply here.

I believe that good support is essential in establishing breastfeeding, I honestly don’t think I would have stuck to it if it hadn’t been for the education and support I received from the ABA. And I want to pay it forward and support others in a difficult, but worthwhile endeavour.

Does that make me a nazi?

Congratulations George and Brad

George Takei and his partner of 21 years have married over the weekend. George has been an active campaigner for marriage equality, so this news is especially joyful.

From George’s personal blog – here is a post written when the laws in California were changed.

Marriage is love, and George and Brad have lived for 21 years as beautiful examples of the best that marriage can offer – now they are finally able to enjoy the rights as well as the responsibilities that come with legal marriage.

Congratulations, I wish you many more years of happiness ahead.

Vegetarian Indian Cooking Class

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Simone and I went to the Muhglai Feast class today, and had a wonderful time.

Highly recommended – even if you’re not vegetarian.

We made Dahl Makhani, Palak Paneer, Malai Kofta, a spiced rice dish, a mint and yoghurt side dish, an onion side dish, naan, and a fabulous dessert.

Yum.

And then I came home and made congee for dinner for the first time.  I made it with dried shitake mushrooms, frozen peas and some vegetarian chinese sausage I had in the freezer, ginger, vegetarian chicken stock and broken rice.  I can see how I can improve it next time, but all in all it was quite yummy, and a pretty good lazy Sunday dinner.

Feeling Sick

Doing this parenting course has made me think a bit more about parenting theories, and this morning I came across two that I had never heard of before.

The first, promoted by the Ezzos, uses the bible to promote old testament rigidity on children. The link is to a site explaining why the Ezzo method is dangerous – not to the official site.

The second, promoted by the Pearls, is very similar, but quite shocking in its promotion of violence against children, even babies a few months old.

Here is an excerpt from an article on toddler taming

So, when your child of any age starts throwing a tantrum, NEVER, NEVER… I repeat, NEVER give in to their demands. Your denial of their lust, coupled with a good stinging swat or two, will cause the child to see the futility and helplessness of his demands. When your child is convinced by your consistent response of enforcing negative consequences for negative behavior, he will cease his vain and tiresome behavior, employing some other means to achieve pleasure.

I feel sick. It’s revolting and shocking to me that these people are allowed to promote such dangerous ideas. This is NOT my idea of Christianity, any more that suicide bombers reflect true Islam.