How do I really feel about having a boy?

I’ll be ok.

I’ve spent a few days thinking about it, and I think the real reason I wanted a girl is because I feel that I have more to offer a girl. My experience is as a girl, and there is a hell of a lot of stuff that I worked out and feel that I could share with a girl.

But on the upside, boy stuff is pretty uncomplicated.

Now to the serious stuff.

I think it’s ok to admit that I’m miserable. I crashed the car on saturday night, and scared the shit out of Mark and myself. We’re OK (I had some cramps, and was worried about Ampersand for a bit, but ok now), but the car is in hospital. It’s making odd noises, pulling to the left, and bottoming out in places where it never did before. So my trip south to visit Ailsa has to be postponed. And I just went to her blog to get the link, and I see that she HAS A NEW PUPPY!

The social worker form the hospital rang today, and I just couldn’t tell her I was ok. Instead, I burst into tears, and found myself realising that I’m losing my grip on the OKness of the world. There’s a bit of industrial action at the serotonin factory. So I spent most of today feeling sorry for my self without recognising it, then bawling into the phone at a complete stranger, and then I had to drag my sorry carcass up the hill to the car hospital, only to be told that I’d have to leave it overnight for a diagnosis. I didn’t cry, but neither did I continue on to the shops to get something for dinner tonight.

Back home to bed, wondering if Mark can cope with boiled rice for dinner again tonight.

14 thoughts on “How do I really feel about having a boy?”

  1. 1. Boy – I’ve decided if I have children, I’d like a boy. Why? Cause girls grow up to be teenage girls who are seriously scary.

    2. Sorry to hear about your car and glad to hear that Ampersand is okay.

    3. You want help with dinner? I can come round. I’d invite you over tonight, except I know that my family are having a carnivorous dinner planned. But I can come round and whip something up for you!!

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  2. I was glad I had a girl first, then very miffed when the second one turned out to be a boy. I didn’t even have any brothers! But it was much easier than I thought it would be and he’s turned out to be a gem. Each one’s different, and has to be taken as they come, and the gender doesn’t really seem to be the biggest issue in the end. Hope eveything settles down soon and the car recovers quickly and cheaply.

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  3. Glad you are okay, the hunk o’ metal can be repaired. Take lots of time for you. And I’m with Lien, teenage girls are scary, at this stage I’d rather a boy!! Have a cup of tea, cuddle some bunnies and relax as much as you can.

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  4. OK, that’s it. Any more posts like this & a serious care package will have to be assembled (somehow this will have to be transported by owl, though, since I don’t have your address!).

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  5. Boys are cool – you married one, didn’t you? I’m not sure about the whole “Mother/Daughter” thing so I’m glad I had the lad. I don’t think I would have been able to cope if he had been a Barbie loving she.
    Hang in there through the Downs cause you know some Ups are coming. It’s a bit like surfing – go with the hormones and don’t worry about feeling sorry for yourself – someone has to.
    Chookas

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  6. Gender – HUH! – Ampersand will be the CHILD OF YOU AND MARK so he will therefore be loved, cherished and fabulous… just like you are Lara.

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  7. You married a lovely man and now’s your opportunity to create another one – and as we both know, the world could do with a few (no, a lot) more good men.

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  8. I know how you feel. I was convinced that Hamish was a girl (named Jemima btw) and my first words upon being presented with him were “It’s just enlarged labia!”.

    Like you, I have no sisters, and I had fantasised about creating a mother-daughter relationship like the one I’ve never had with my own mum.

    Then, when preggers with Ferg, I had the ultrasound and asked to know gender to avoid the same feeling of disappointment on the day of delivery. I WAS disappointed… I’ll admit it…. but only for the couple of days it took me to turn my expectations around. By the time he was born I was just THRILLED to have another boy.

    Now I am scared of girls!! And I’m SO glad that I’m a mother of boys!

    So…. I guess I’m saying that all this is good honest healthy processing my darling.

    btw…. sorry about the car. Want to buy an Audi?!?!?

    xxxxxxx

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  9. ride out the fabulousness (NOT) of hormones – it gets easier as the pregnancy progresses. Glad to hear that you are OK after the car incident. Let us know if we can help in anyway – im getting better at vegetarian recipes ! Alex sends his love and raspberries (the latest thing for him) and cant wait to met his cousin !

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  10. you know, I felt a bit the same way when I found out I was having a boy. I had a serious case of ‘what do I do with a boy? I’m a girl, I don’t know boys!’ But you know what, boys are seriously into their mums, that old saying about daddy’s girl and mumma’s boys? so true. they really love their mums. My little boy is the most loving affection kid around. I am so happy I don’t have a ouse filled with pink barbie stuff everywhere (although there are a massive amount of cars…)

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  11. As you know I had Kaela first and when I found out Hamish was a boy I cried cause I had all this lovely girl stuff hanging around to hand down. But – 5 years on I would have to say, hands down, my son is SO much easier to live with. He loves me with every breathe but without the drama that us girls have built in naturally. This is not in any way negative to my lovely daughter but they are, gender wise, so very very very different…..(that sounds stupid but I think you know what I mean)

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