Family Matters

Mum’s cousin Thomas died this morning. Aunty Emily wasn’t able to rouse him, and the paramedics couldn’t resuscitate. He was 65, and none of us had any idea he was in ill health.

Aunty Emily lived with, and for Thomas for sixty five years, and now she feels like the has nothing to live for. She has another son (famous for saying “it should have been me, I’m the alcoholic”), but Thomas never moved out of home. He was there every day of his life, except the Saturday Sabbath, which he spent at church.

I do hope there is a heaven, otherwise Thomas had a whole lot of boring saturdays for nothing.

There will be an autopsy, and then a funeral, and somehow we’ll have to convince Aunty Emily to move out of her home. And perhaps Cocky will come and join us at Club Denistone. Can anyone recommend a bird rehabber, or a cockatoo behaviour resource?

Please spare a thought for an old lady who has had a terrible shock. No parent should outlive their children, even at 89.

And on a happier note, hereis a little video of TBA doing the cute thing.

3 thoughts on “Family Matters”

  1. complete stranger/lurker chiming in.

    i am so sorry. you are right. no parent should outlive their children. this will be sooo difficult for your entire family. indescribably so. it is such a shock, and all of the feelings are so complicated: abysmal grief, forgetting that he’s gone, followed by even worse grief; complete, relentless bafflement, and all the rest. i speak from experience, but will spare you the details. suffice it to say that my thoughts are with you all. do try to encourage aunty emily to eat. don’t push too hard, but at least a little bit now and then. and i found for myself that a small glass or two of sherry or port at bedtime can take the edge off the emotional pain, if health permits. much will be up to aunty emily herself.

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  2. I’m so sorry to read that, my thoughts have been with you and your family.

    On the parrot notes: the following is a collection of links and posts put on livejournal by the parrot lovers community.

    http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=parrot_lovers

    There’s not specific about sulfur crested cockatoos, but some of the cockatoo information may be helpful. Certainly the bit on toys and diet may be of interest. (variety! Things to throw! And as I’ve recently learnt, they love peaches and can cover an entire back garden with peach mulch.)

    They are amazingly dusty birds, which may be an issue for you. They love bathing, which can control the issue a bit.

    They do give fair warning before biting, unless they are insane. I’ve met an insane one. He indicated by body language and speech that he’d like a scratch. Using a twig, I gave him a scratch, giving him plenty of space to decide that wasn’t what he wanted. Stopped, he asked again, presented the back of his head in a submissive position. He turned without warning and bit my twig in half. You don’t need to be told because I know that you treat all living things with respect, but these guys are three year olds with a can-opener on their face.

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  3. Growing up I had a friend with a sulphur-crested cockatoo. The thing was spoiled rotten & a definite attention hog. I do think he was bored much of the time, even though he had a fairly big cage & toys. I can’t recommend resources, but what Emma said rings true to my memories.

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