Whinge…

Moan…

Complain…

It’s all I ever seem to do around here. I feel horrible, I don’t know whether I feel worse because I feel worse, or because I might actually be really sick, and the dr is taking me seriously. Normal iron deficient anaemia happens over time, a gradual worsening with poor diet and insufficient iron intake. But because I gave blood on the 15th of October, I can’t have had low iron then, or they wouldn’t have taken my blood. So I’ve developed this deficiency in less than a month (felt like overnight to me…), and that isn’t normal.

The most likely causes of this type of anaemia (according to wikipedia, the font of all wisdom), are parasites or intestinal worms, gastro-intestinal ulcers (causing internal bleeding), and bowel polyps and cancer. That’s quite a spectrum, and though it would be poetic justice for me to have bowel cancer, I can’t believe that is it.

So, happy thoughts….

I saw the lovely Anna today, and she is spectacularly amazing. Of course, she will never be the same person as she was before Lara died, but she is finding some joy, and life is slowly gaining some colour for her.

Inigo has discovered big and small. Today we have been alternating between small (gentle and quite) cuddles, and big (loud and wobbly and squeezy) cuddles. There is no possible way to describe the joy of a small boy launching himself at you demanding “BIG CUDDLES”, and then collapsing, paralysed with glee in your lap. Or his soft breath, asking with perfect manners, “little kiss please Mama”.

It doesn’t get much better than that.