Disco Knitter

Along with a few of my favourite blogs, I’ve been nominated for an award, by another of my favourite blogs – Pierre the Yarn Snob.

Meg said some very sweet things about the blog, and it came at just the right time. I’ve been having a few doubts about the worth of this blog because of some of the trickier ramifications in the real world.

And now I have to nominate seven of my favourites.

Longtime readers of this blog will know most of my faves, as I link to them from time to time. But recently I’ve been reading a few more parenting blogs, as I like to feel that I’m not the only crafty, queer friendly, left wing, vegetarian, cloth nappying, attachment parent in Granville.

OK, so I probably am the only one, but having some internet friends makes me feel better.

Enjoy!

1. Joy of Socks – I love this blog, not just because she gave me Sundara Yarn, but also because she is smart, funny, the mother of a gorgeous kid, and also still managed to knit. (I thought I’d better start the list with a knitter, ease you into it).
2. Her Bad Mother. I started reading this blog after a friend pointed out this post. It made me squirm, and gasp a little. Being a mother is such a huge thing, and somehow we still have to be the other as well as the mother.
3. Eucalyptus Jandals. A mum, a writer, and a teacher. She makes me think, blogs about deep issues, and cares passionately about things.
4. Sarah’s Blog. I don’t get to see him very often, but I can keep up with Alex here.
5. It’s Not Easy Being Green. Imagine – cool people, in Granville! Well, actually a whole suburb away, but it’s pretty damn close
6. Suburban Safari. She doesn’t post nearly often enough, but she has twins, so I am not inclined to judge. She’s clever, and witty, and cool, and she lives too far away.
7. Fe… a Life. When I first met Fe, I thought she was far too beautiful, clever, and talented to ever want to have anything to do with me. But she did! Fe blogs about her gorgeous boys, her struggles with the black dog, life as a cancer survivor, and day to day battles with Australian Family Law and an evil ex.

He was 10 months old yesterday, but the post needs some explanatory video, or at least a cute picture, and the child won’t co-operate while the camera is ready.

So in the meantime, enjoy some bunny porn…

From icanhascheezburger.com

Inigo and Ella play with Bev & Ted

Last week, you started waving. Real, recognisable interaction. You’ve been charming random strangers everywhere we go, and even grabbing at them in shops. I can tell I’m going to have to lift my game with the omniscience – you’re already so much more capable of mischief I can’t predict, and you’re only going to get trickier and trickier. I’ve had two unexpected baths in the last week. One water, one beer. Water smells better on a hot day. Less sticky too.

It’s getting harder and harder to breastfeed you in public – anywhere that isn’t the bedroom, where there is nothing to look at but grey walls and roof, yet you still manage to wriggle and squirm and examine every little thing instead of eating. I am thinking we might need a sensory deprivation chamber if I’m going to keep feeding you until you’re 2 as the paediatrician recommends.

You’ve developed the pincer grip, you can pick up peas and even get them in your mouth. It’s fun, but you aren’t that fond of peas, so the game becomes pea flinging very quickly. You’ve been increasingly interested in real human food instead of your exquisitely prepared steamed veggies and lentil mush. Funny that. Last week you tried Masala Dosa, Sri Lankan Roti, Hoppers, and Eggplant Curry. You loved the explosion of flavours, but the sensation of chilli in your mouth afterwards caused some confusion.

You’ve started to show an interest in climbing, but no real ability. The best fun is climbing on me after a feed, with the added thrill of possibly spewing on the bedclothes when I least expect it.

You enthusiastically grab on to my hands and haul yourself up to sitting, and standing positions, but you haven’t yet worked out that you can grab other things to pull yourself up. You’re crawling a lot more, and move quite quickly, but still only backwards. There has been a little forwards motion, but only while sitting up, and pulling yourself along with your hands.

You’re turning into a great sleeper, as long as we keep our expectations of daytime sleeps low. Yesterday you went all day on just one short day sleep, and you continued to charm the crowds with only a little whinging.

The yelling is getting creative. You’ve discovered that you can stick the back of your fist in and out of your mouth to modify the sound. And you love echoes – our fave south Indian restaurant has the most appalling acoustics, and you take full advantage of the tiled floors to shriek, yell, mumble, mutter and ululate.

As well as exploring the limits of your vocal range, you’re still enjoying peek-a-boo, gumming everything in reach and drinking everything in with your huge eyes. But the Best. Fun. Ever. is being swung around by one arm and one leg. I asked that paed if that was ok, she took a breath, looked at me straight on, and said “just make sure you lift from the upper arm, not the forearm”.

Weeeeee!

Finally, a comment on Sarah Palin that I can get behind.

So, the kid is great, the weather is beautiful, the house is a shambles, and I’m spending every spare minute with my new paint set.

Life looks pretty good from here.

Today was Inigo’s check-up with Dr McVeagh. Since he hit the magic 50th percentile, my concern about today had eased a little, but I still asked Mark to take the day off and come with us today.

When we walked in, Dr McVeagh questioned if he was the same baby

He’s just above average for height, weight, and now head circumference too! The head has stopped growing at a rate of knots, and has slowed down to just slightly unfeasible, instead of alarmingly outrageous.

He got a perfect score from the doc, and we don’t have to go back until after Christmas.

Hoo – freaking – ray!

Some good news.

When Kevin ‘07 won the election, I really only felt relief that John Howard wasn’t going to embarrass us in front of the neighbours any more.

But then he ratified Kyoto.

And then he said Sorry.

And I dared to feel hopeful.

But then, for a long time, nothing happened.

This news is wonderful – it is not just a symbolic gesture, it is a powerful and practical move that will hopefully make things just a little bit easier.

Keep it up Kev – there is more to do.

Like Relationship Equality for example.

Edited to add – it appears that this change only applies to lesbian parents. I wonder when men will get the same rights.

Edited again – Red quite rightly points out that this is NSW only. Of course it would be far too sensible to have a single system for the whole country!

*I’ve been sitting on this post for a few days, because I don’t want to offend anyone. I’ve decided to post, because it’s stuff I believe, and I think it’s important. It is not about you – and if you think I am having a go, I’m not. I’m just very sad and frustrated, and this is what I was thinking as I tried to work through the issues in my head.

The continuing horror of the melamine laced milk in China has me in tears every time I think about it. Kidney stones are one of the most painful things that can happen to a grown up, so the thought of it happening to thousands and thousands of babies is beyond imagining.

And the more I think about it, the more concerned I am. Because this should never have happened. As I see it, three things contributed to the problem, and there is no easy fix. This could happen again and again (and probably will), unless these three things change.

1. Greed. Obvious, but it would be over simplifying things of we just left it at that.
2. Marketing. This is part of greed – but it’s a two way street. If we call Nestle and it’s ilk “The Bad Guys”, and the World Health Organisation “The Good Guys”, it’s important that the good guys get the same marketing budget as the bad guys.
3. Backlash. When I was a young ‘un, I believed that feminism was over. I thought that my mother and her generation had fought the good fight, and won. It was a rude shock, and it was about a decade later that the book Backlash came out, describing the new front on which feminism is being fought. It is because of this backlash that we saw the rise of raunch culture, and the popularity of the phrase “I’m not a feminist, but…(insert feminist statement here)”.

I believe the same thing is happening in baby health. The 70’s saw the lowest rates of breastfeeding in Australia, and in the 80’s things turned around. More research was done in human lactation, and women were encouraged to go back to the boob. The artificial milk marketing machine began to work on developing nations, and there were appalling consequences for child health. Back then, I had only a peripheral knowledge of what was going on, but I stopped buying Nestle products because of their unethical business practices.

And now, In Australia, breastfeeding is strongly encouraged in hospital. The Australian Breastfeeding Association has chapters all over the country, and is a fantastic resource for anyone who wants to breastfeed and is having hassles. There are accreditation programs for businesses that want to become breastfeeding friendly workplaces, and we have laws to protect a woman’s right to feed her child in public. We don’t have paid maternity leave, which would be a big help, but we’re working on it.

There is the expectation that most women will at least try to breastfeed. So of course there is a fine balance between behaviour that is supportive of the establishment of the breastfeeding relationship, and behaviour that is aggressive and judgemental.

I have heard the term “Breastfeeding Nazi” too many times now. I understand that many people feel judged because they don’t breastfeed, and I am sincerely sorry for that. I know that EVERY mother wants to do the best for her child. And for some babies, the best is artificial milk. I struggled for months to get it working for Inigo and I, so I feel that I am qualified to say that I understand the pain and suffering when it’s not working. And I was accused by a friend of just being “trendy” by insisting on breastfeeding. She honestly thought that Inigo’s weight problem was caused by breastfeeding, and that if I would just give him artificial milk, he would be fine.

There were many times when I thought that both of us would be better off if I just gave him artificial milk, so I have profound empathy for women who have made that choice. I don’t have an answer for how we can be supportive of breastfeeding and supportive of artificial feeding if breastfeeding doesn’t work out – but let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water.

Research shows that human milk is best for human babies (barring medical complications like rare allergies, etc.). That is a fact. Research also shows that babies are healthier when they are born full term. They are better off if their mothers don’t smoke, if their fathers don’t take cocaine, if they aren’t exposed to lead pollution. We all want to provide the very best for our children, and the best is human milk.

Ancient internet lore has it that the first person to mention Hitler or the Nazis automatically loses any flame war, and I think that principle should apply here.

I believe that good support is essential in establishing breastfeeding, I honestly don’t think I would have stuck to it if it hadn’t been for the education and support I received from the ABA. And I want to pay it forward and support others in a difficult, but worthwhile endeavour.

Does that make me a nazi?

Bex sent me this link to an article about feeding kids.

Obviously I am doing my best to feed the kid, but some of these were new to me. Some of them are no brainers, but worth a read…

BTW – ‘usband has been tinkering with the blog. All will come good in the fullness of time.

Thanks to Suzanne for this…

George Takei and his partner of 21 years have married over the weekend. George has been an active campaigner for marriage equality, so this news is especially joyful.

From George’s personal blog – here is a post written when the laws in California were changed.

Marriage is love, and George and Brad have lived for 21 years as beautiful examples of the best that marriage can offer – now they are finally able to enjoy the rights as well as the responsibilities that come with legal marriage.

Congratulations, I wish you many more years of happiness ahead.

I went to a baby shower where one of the games challenged us to identify mystery foods smeared in a disposable nappy. That was pretty gross, but for something even worse, click here, and navigate to picture 11 of 17.

It’s worthy of cake wrecks, but for the fact it was submitted by an amateur.

Simone and I went to the Muhglai Feast class today, and had a wonderful time.

Highly recommended – even if you’re not vegetarian.

We made Dahl Makhani, Palak Paneer, Malai Kofta, a spiced rice dish, a mint and yoghurt side dish, an onion side dish, naan, and a fabulous dessert.

Yum.

And then I came home and made congee for dinner for the first time.  I made it with dried shitake mushrooms, frozen peas and some vegetarian chinese sausage I had in the freezer, ginger, vegetarian chicken stock and broken rice.  I can see how I can improve it next time, but all in all it was quite yummy, and a pretty good lazy Sunday dinner.

I’ve just experienced the most thrilling moment of television sport since Cathy Freeman ran the 400m in Sydney.

Murderball/Wheelchair Rugby – Australia Vs. NZ. The game was won in the last half second by Ryley Batt.

Amazing. Can’t wait for the next match.

No, I don’t have an iPhone.  Yes, I want one very badly.  So, what to do?

Poke fun at the object of desire.

Original here.

Doing this parenting course has made me think a bit more about parenting theories, and this morning I came across two that I had never heard of before.

The first, promoted by the Ezzos, uses the bible to promote old testament rigidity on children. The link is to a site explaining why the Ezzo method is dangerous – not to the official site.

The second, promoted by the Pearls, is very similar, but quite shocking in its promotion of violence against children, even babies a few months old.

Here is an excerpt from an article on toddler taming -

So, when your child of any age starts throwing a tantrum, NEVER, NEVER… I repeat, NEVER give in to their demands. Your denial of their lust, coupled with a good stinging swat or two, will cause the child to see the futility and helplessness of his demands. When your child is convinced by your consistent response of enforcing negative consequences for negative behavior, he will cease his vain and tiresome behavior, employing some other means to achieve pleasure.

I feel sick. It’s revolting and shocking to me that these people are allowed to promote such dangerous ideas. This is NOT my idea of Christianity, any more that suicide bombers reflect true Islam.

…maybe this will make it’s way into Inigo’s world.

Scratch that. A few minutes on ebay, $12 from my paypal account, and another dream comes true.

Joy!

Thank you everyone who signed the petition for Ivy. I have never before heard of an online petition making a difference – but this one did.

Ivy will be going to hospital tomorrow to have her treatment.

Let’s hope it gives her some relief.

I spoke too soon. Temp was up again slightly this afternoon – 37.6

More panadol, more vigilance.

I hope everyone else is having a great Fathers Day.

And a Happy Fathers Day to my Dad, who is currently enjoying the sights of Singapore, on his way home from Vietnam. I miss you dad.

Inigo’s Temperature has been normal since lunch time yesterday, so I am starting to relax a little. The snot production is still in full swing though, and I’m having to express and bottle feed, since he can’t breathe through his nose enough to feed properly.

He’s also having trouble sleeping, but apart from all that is still a happy chap for fathers day.

I hate grocery shopping. HATE it. But apparently, we need to eat, and the fairies don’t deliver to people who don’t believe in them.

I could do online shopping, but paying the delivery fee plus the full price on every item bites. And I have to think about what I want up to two days before I want it.

So after avoiding the shops for two weeks, I braved it last night. Mark had the kid, I was on my own, and I thought I’d better bite the bullet.

Big mistake.

I pushed the trolley around, got most of the stuff I needed (and some that I didn’t – forgot to take the list with me), and lined up to pay.

I had my keys and wallet in the top of the trolley, pulled my wallet out to pay, leaving my keys on the child seat. I pushed the trolley through to start loading full bags onto the trolley, turned back to the operator for a second, then turned back and my trolley was gone, along with my keys.

Fast forward an anxious hour, trying to keep watch on every trolley in the store to keep an eye out for my keys, make sure nobody pinches the car, and watch my trolley full of (paid for) groceries. Of course, I had left the phone in the car, so I couldn’t even call Mark to explain where I was.

Eventually a sweet kid handed them to me – they were still in the trolley, mysteriously waiting near the liquor area.

After that experience, online shopping is looking better and better!